Saturday, 23 July 2016

Thoughts

I decided to put up something that wasn’t perfect. My random not so deep thoughts, typed out as I thought them. Sometimes ‘carefully thought out material and posts edited to the very core’ isn’t the new black.

I got a new laptop today. I’ve had the same old rickety one for about six years, and everyone in modern life will know that is like a KILLER PERFORMANCE (life span) for a computer. 

I kind of like having a blog that I can ramble to no one in particular. How great is it that in thirty years  - if we are still using the internet and not some weird hologram thing - I can look back at my 15/16/17 y/o thoughts? Powerful. 

I’ve been missing in action for a couple weeks. Not on youtube, but more so having a routine. I have been off school for three weeks. Bliss. But I haven’t really been holiday-ing too much. Long story.

It’s been hard to look at the news each day.. I have become scared at what I will read. Each day there is a life lost, for some reason I don’t even understand. I’m trying to be numb. Anyway.

I went to the flume concert last night. It was very weird being in a mosh pit. Flume gives you that kind of youthy, ecstatic feeling, like nothing matters except for tonight. Well it gives me that feeling. I don’t really know the point of this post, I just wanted to put something out there. Carrie (Bradshaw) got me thinking about relationships in some type of way. After being in a relationship with someone for a year at seventeen, it really changes you. This year I’m facing final exams, university????, decisions for career choices, and a lot of other normal teenage things and not so normal. 

I’ve been doing this thing each day (most days) where I don’t check my phone immediately when I wake up. I like it because it gives me a little bit of time to wake up from the hazy morning feeling without being thrown into deep sea real life. Checking all my emails, scrolling and typing is all I seem to be doing these days. That’s why I’m creating some me time.

That is one thing that will last. ^
I always sporadically take up these mantras in my life, habits that I think I will be consistent with. Diets, journal writing, meditation. But you can’t force yourself to be a type of way. But then again, that’s probably why my brain is so all over the place - judging by this post.

I mean I am on my phone a lot, a little too much for my liking and I feel like I miss out on a lot of things. Haha, thats where I get confused about the Pokemon go game. I mean it gets people outside and all that but then again, what are they doing - staring down at their phones? I can’t talk. I don’t play the game personally, but I’m on my phone a hell of a lot. Social media isn’t real life and it doesn’t really do much to further my life but I grew up in a generation with ever present technology that adapts and continues to advance before my very eyes. Therefore I’m not going to feel bad if I use it.

Three things I am excited about.
  1. Getting my first apartment and decorating it the way I want.
  2. Having a job I love.
  3. Going to Pompeii to see ancient ruins (because I am a classics nerd) and New York.

All things to look forward to, when I’m older and more composed. Or now. Who knows?


PS: Growing up is hard to do.